BACK... with a Vengeance

26/dec/05
1150a

After much prolonged silence...
At this point, taking off where i left off seems the hardest thing to do. That point is just too hurtful to be going back to. Not that it's entirely over. However, a few baby steps will get me somewhere i know. I still wonder at times why people do what they do. Christmas didn't even come as an excuse. It still brings shivers down my spine to take a glimpse of dark places, or to catch myself alone. Somewhere between imagination and reality, i know deep down, this feeling's just got to go.

I've gotten text messages and calls from friends wondering how i've been and it's such a boosting thought to be remembered and cared for. I really don't know what to say. I am okay. Somehow.

The past weeks have been very unforgiving, not to mention the terribly irritating presence that lurks around in the person of someone who's just being obnoxious, down to our bones. At Christmastime???!!

Okay. Enough of that one!

Now you. You who have been there to constantly look after a friend. Thanks for checkin on me check. Thanks for reminding me to find my writing again. It's just been a very difficult time lang. Thanks for the call on "engagement" chin. You've made me one of your happiest friends. You are living proof that we get second chances... and whatever chance we've missed in the past, will not always be necessarily the best. Just look at you. Thanks for the patience and the undying anticipation yvette. I've finally written again. And Penny!! you are my most pleasant surprise. Thanks for taking time to write me a letter. Unexpected but really, you made my heart swell. To my IAS family, you have endured so much crap lately with me and i will not trade that with anything else. This friendship i mean. It's one of my greatest gifts. Heads up ladies! There is strength in numbers. :)

Enough said for now. Believe that i am back, with all the courage i can muster to fight my battles head-on. Faith is worth fighting so hard for. There is something and someone better out there and it takes more than just hope to get us all there.

Buckle up and hold firm. I'm giving it my best shot this time.